It’s Okay to Make Mistakes & Embrace Right Where You Are

You may have seen this on my social media feeds, but I wanted to capture it on my blog as well since social media isn’t a space I have ultimate control over.

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Literally EVERYTHING can be a teacher if you’re willing to self-reflect.

Yesterday I went into the studio to record. During the session, I was invited to do something I don’t do—adlib. In fact, when I was asked to adlib, I went into this fuzzy brain space of complete blankness and seriously could not perform.

Fortunately, I don’t take myself too seriously in almost any situation, so I didn’t feel stupid or embarrassed, but I definitely felt uncomfortable for a few minutes (which I was later able to identify as the emotion of frustration with my lack of competence). In fact, when suggestions were made in the moment, I couldn’t even incorporate them because I was so thrown off by being asked to do something I’ve never done, but felt I “should” be able to do. I then waterfalled into verbal explanations of my lack of vocal ability and insecurities with my voice, which wasn’t helpful.

I went home, and while making dinner, caught myself thinking thoughts like, “I’m not a vocalist. I’m more of a songwriter who feels compelled to sing her own songs.” But then I realized those thoughts are not helpful. They are my past speaking.

I have struggled for years to embrace my voice on many levels, but I’m not interested in nurturing the past, or keeping the status quo. And it’s really not even about how competent a vocalist I am. It’s about owning my current state of being without excuses, and recognizing potential for growth—that I can choose whether or not I want to expand on in any given area at any given time.

Last month, I made a commitment to myself to pursue a year of music and sharing—to courageously use my voice (hence this post)– so of course I would be confronted with circumstances that would ask me to look at, and push through, relevant blocks. So, I’m grateful for yesterday. I’m grateful for the opportunity to look at my “stuff” and know that I can respond differently next time.

I hope this post gives somebody, who may be struggling with their voice (physically or symbolically), permission to be okay with where they’re at on their journey, recognizing that discomfort is always an opportunity to have a conversation with the Self and make new decisions about how you want to move forward. We only have one life. I’d like to try and live mine better today than I was yesterday!